Do not go gentle into that good night
- Danielle Hughes
- 3 hours ago
- 5 min read
Stop shrinking: how to speak up and claim the career you deserve
Do not go gentle into that good night,
Old age should burn and rave at close of day;
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.
Though wise men at their end know dark is right,
Because their words had forked no lightning they
Do not go gentle into that good night.
Good men, the last wave by, crying how bright
Their frail deeds might have danced in a green bay,
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.
Wild men who caught and sang the sun in flight,
And learn, too late, they grieved it on its way,
Do not go gentle into that good night.
Grave men, near death, who see with blinding sight
Blind eyes could blaze like meteors and be gay,
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.
And you, my father, there on the sad height,
Curse, bless, me now with your fierce tears, I pray.
Do not go gentle into that good night.
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.
Dylan Thomas
Did you know I was an English Literature Minor?
Most of you probably assume there’s writing in my background, but in truth I was an art major and literature minor. And English Lit at that. And while Dylan Thomas is Welsh, for some reason he wasn’t one of the authors I studied.
However, as I prepared to write this newsletter, I couldn’t get the title of this poem out of my head.
It’s meant to speak to a refusal to accept death so easily and to live life with passion and fight.
But to me it also symbolizes speaking up and being heard.
Not going quietly in any situation.
Not volume, but in being able to say what you want to say and have the confidence to say it.
Say the thing
So many times when I’m talking to clients about what roles they’re looking for or what they want to do, the response is something like “well, I could do this, or I could do that, or I think I’d like that.” You get the picture.
But when I tell them to “say the thing” — to say what they want, not what they think they can do but what they actually want to do — that’s when they finally express what’s in their heart.
Not anything.
Not 10 things.
The one thing.
What they have passion for.
What they’re good at and excited for.
What they see themselves doing and want to do.
But saying this and believing it and pursuing it is hard.
Unmute yourself
Why? Why is this so hard? Because for years, or decades, or since birth, many of us, especially women, have been told to suppress what we really want.
What we really want to say.
We’ve been told to show up a certain way, talk a certain way, wear certain things.
Traditionally, boys, then men, are encouraged to raise their hands and speak up.
They’re taught that what they have to say, anything they have to say, has value.
Whereas women are taught to be thoughtful, speak when spoken to and let the men talk.
This is gendered.
This is stereotypical.
It’s also real.
It’s patriarchal.
And while we’ve made many strides as a society, we’re still far from there when it comes to the value we place on men and women’s voices.
What will be your legacy?
And this is never more obvious than in women in their 40’s and 50’s (or even 60’s).
Women who have maybe 1-2 decades of career left and are at that inflection point.
These women, the majority of my clients, are at a critical juncture.
They worry, or they know, that if they just keep doing what they’ve been doing things are likely going to be fine.
They’ll finish out their career and hopefully retire one day.
Fine. Just Fine.
But deep down they’re fed up with fine.
They don’t want f&cking fine.
They want to determine what’s next, not have someone do it for them.
They see what’s ahead and they want to control it.
They want to say THIS is the thing.
This is the thing I want to do.
This is the role I want to have.
This is the career I deserve.
And you can.
Rather than squeezing yourself into someone else’s version of leadership, this small group cohort guides you through a process to tap into what’s real, genuine, and already powerful within you.
With just 4–8 women, you get connection without overwhelm — and the courage to show up as the best version of yourself, whether you’re pursuing a new role, stepping into leadership, seeking a promotion, or redefining your direction.
Join me, and Leadership Coach, Melissa Bloom for two powerful sessions, March 11 and 18, to uncover your values and tap into your brand and own your story.
What’s included:
2, one-hour small group coaching sessions
Your choice of a 30–minute one-on-one session with either of us
You also receive:
access to session recording
async feedback
downloadable materials
prompts for reflection and action
email support
shared Google Drive to keep everything organized and at your fingertips
When:
March 11 and 18th
1-2pm EST
If you’re tired of being tired.
If you’re ready to say the thing.
If you know this is your time to determine what’s next, join us.
Why is it so hard for women to speak up at work — even when we know what we want to say?
Because we’ve been trained not to. Trained to be likable. Trained to be accommodating. Trained to be “professional” (whatever that means) instead of honest. So we edit ourselves mid-sentence, soften the edges, and swallow the thing that actually matters. It’s not a confidence issue. It’s conditioning. And the good news? Conditioning can be unlearned.
How do I find my voice again after years of shrinking myself professionally?
Start small. Notice where you’re holding back. Notice what you almost said in that meeting. Notice the opinion you texted to a friend but didn’t share out loud. Your voice isn’t gone — it’s just been muted. Reclaiming it isn’t about becoming louder. It’s about becoming more honest. One sentence at a time.
What does “owning your narrative” actually mean in your career?
It means you stop waiting for someone else to define you. You decide what this season is about. You name what you’re good at. You claim what you want. You stop defaulting into the next “logical” step and start choosing intentionally. Owning your narrative is saying: this is who I am, this is what I do, and this is the direction I’m going. Without apology.